stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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