susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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