Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Randomize
