Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
There are leaves in my underwear?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
