I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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