I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
