We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Houston, we have a blender
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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