At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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