Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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