butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
