I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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