Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
She needs sedatives and a leash
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
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