So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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