So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
