please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
