I can tuck mytits in my pants
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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