the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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