I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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