Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Life is so much better after having sex.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
