i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
