thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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