I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
