Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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