Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
So much Jack, so little girl.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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