I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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