so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
