ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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