I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
