You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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