Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize