I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
