If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
