I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize