so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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