I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
