I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
