Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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