Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
