if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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