Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize