She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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