bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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