You really coming over, don't trick.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
