She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
