Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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