so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
