Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
