Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize