you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
