Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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