Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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