is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize