I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
